OCD vs. Perfectionism: When “Just Right” Goes All Wrong

Manage the urge to do things perfectly and be more content with a therapist at La Jolla Therapy Center that specializes in anxiety.

I knew I had a problem when I found myself organizing my closet by color and season. I was also making sure all of my clothes and hangers were hanging facing the same direction. “It’s fine,” I told myself. “This is normal. People do this.” Then I realized I was spending way too much time and energy on organizing my closet.

Now, as a therapist, I should’ve recognized this for what it was: a classic case of perfectionism meets compulsion. But in the moment? I was just making sure my clothes were organized the way they should be and it would make my life a lot easier. Because if my closet was in order, then surely my life was in order, right? (We all know the ending to this story).

It was a humbling realization—and one that got me thinking about how often perfectionism gets mistaken for Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). Let’s break it down, with some humor (because laughing at our own neuroses is cheaper than therapy).

OCD: It’s Not Just “Liking Things Neat”

OCD is one of the most misunderstood mental health conditions out there. It’s not just about liking things tidy or preferring a clean workspace. OCD is a disorder characterized by:

• Obsessions – Persistent, intrusive thoughts that create significant anxiety (e.g., “If I don’t check the stove ten times, the house will burn down”).

• Compulsions – Repetitive behaviors or mental rituals done to reduce anxiety (e.g., checking the stove ten times to prevent an imaginary fire).

  
  

It’s not enjoyable. It’s not quirky. It’s not just being a neat freak. It’s exhausting. Imagine your brain is a smoke detector that goes off every time you toast a bagel. That’s OCD—your mind constantly overreacting to perceived threats, convincing you that unless you perform certain rituals, disaster will strike.

Perfectionism, on the other hand? That’s a different beast.

Perfectionism: The Impossible Quest for “Just Right”

Perfectionism is like that overzealous life coach who shouts, “If you’re not first, you’re last!” It’s an internalized pressure to meet unrealistically high standards, often tied to self-worth. While it can show up in OCD, perfectionism itself isn’t a disorder—it’s more of a personality trait (albeit an anxiety-inducing one).

People with perfectionism:

• Rewrite emails 10 times before sending.

• Take 20 minutes to pick a font for their PowerPoint presentation.

• Hesitate to start new projects because they might not be “perfect.”

• Lie awake at night, haunted by the one typo in that text they sent six hours ago.

  
  

Sound familiar? That’s because, to some degree, perfectionism lives in all of us. But when it crosses the line into OCD, that’s when things get trickier.

The Overlap: When Perfectionism and OCD Get Cozy

Perfectionism and OCD have a lot in common—both involve high anxiety, a fear of failure, and a relentless inner critic. But the key difference is why a person is engaging in certain behaviors.

Let’s say you’re organizing your bookshelf:

• Perfectionist You want it color-coded because it looks aesthetically pleasing, and if it’s not, you’ll feel dissatisfied. (This sounds all too familiar!)

  
  

• OCD You feels an overwhelming anxiety that if the books aren’t arranged just right, something bad might happen—maybe you won’t be able to concentrate, or worse, your pet goldfish will mysteriously perish.

  
  

The motivation matters. Perfectionism is about achievement and high standards. OCD is about fear, anxiety, and preventing catastrophe (even if that catastrophe makes zero logical sense).

How to Cope (Without Losing Your Mind Over a Crooked Picture Frame)

If you see yourself in any of this, don’t panic—I promise you’re not alone. Here are some ways to manage both perfectionism and OCD tendencies:

1. Challenge Your Thoughts (Even If They Yell at You)

Your brain can be a drama queen. Just because it tells you something awful will happen if your socks aren’t perfectly folded doesn’t mean it’s true. Try asking yourself: “What’s the worst that will actually happen?” and “Would I tell a friend this same logic?”

2. Set “Good Enough” Goals

Perfectionists hate the phrase “good enough,” but learning to embrace imperfection is life-changing. Start small—send that email after only three drafts instead of 47. Put away your laundry even if the folds aren’t store-display worthy. Nothing implodes.

For OCD-specific compulsions, try delaying the urge to check, wash, or arrange. If you must check the door lock five times, push yourself to wait five minutes before checking again. Over time, your brain will start to realize that it doesn’t need the ritual to feel safe.

4. Expose Yourself (No, Not Like That)

Exposure therapy is one of the best treatments for OCD. If you have a fear of germs and compulsively wash your hands, try touching a doorknob and waiting a few minutes before washing. It’s uncomfortable, but it teaches your brain that discomfort won’t kill you.

5. Laugh at Yourself (When Possible)

Humor is a powerful tool. When I catch myself about to obsessively realign my couch cushions, I remind myself: “This is not an Olympic event.” A little self-awareness goes a long way

Whether you struggle with perfectionism, OCD, or some unholy combination of both, remember: You are not your thoughts, and you are not alone.

The world won’t end if your bed isn’t made with military precision. That email can have a typo and still get the job done. The closet can be organized, but that doesn’t mean it has to be perfectly in order by color and season…either way, life will continue! (At least that’s what I tell myself!)

If perfectionism or OCD are interfering with your daily life, it’s okay to seek help. Therapy (especially Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Exposure Response Prevention) are evidence based treatments that work wonders. And if all else fails, just remind yourself:

Imperfection is human. And a slightly crooked picture frame has never actually hurt anyone...right?

Our San Diego, California based counseling practice specializes in helping teens and adults who struggle with anxiety. Through counseling, we help kids and young adults overcome the negative thought cycles, the constant comparison game, and worst-case scenarios that accompany the anxious brain. Additionally, we offer other mental health services, primarily for perfectionists, overachievers or others who don’t feel like they 100% fit in. More specifically we offer treatment for anxiety/OCD, and depression at La Jolla Therapy Center. If you don’t live around San Diego or the commute makes in-person therapy impossible, all of our services are available via online therapy to anyone physically located in California. Therefore, we work with clients from Sacramento to Palo Alto or even Mountain View. You and your family deserve to finally feel less overwhelmed, so let’s get started!